Dating profiles and no, not those

The dating profiles to which I am referring are not the fabulously exaggerated ones many of us have written in order to sound enticing to the gents. In turn, I am not referring to the many phantasmagorical profiles from the gents,  that couldn't be true but often did make for great reading. Fantasy island, perhaps,  but with a little more gravitas and a lot less humor. MEH

Now, it appears that there is another dating profile that we have and that one is not just our laundry list of must haves but more a personality profile. 

Now that I have caused a little ferklemption/confusion on steroids marked wi thslight palpitations, I will parse out what i am talking about. Stay close as it's a little confusing and somewhat vomitus but ALL GOOD OR CAN BE ULTIMATELY! :)

Let's start with usual laundry list that we all have. Btw, if you say that you've never had one of these, PUHLEEZE, we all do if we have a pulse. Some contain more reality testing than others but yah, they exist and if you've done the sites, apps, you've def done them.

We want the nice, sweet, charming funny, intelligent guy who has his own bank account and doesn't live with his mommy. Or at least that was my mini laundry list.  Should he be handsome? We won't say no, but it's become less important than kind and fun loving and caring and for me,  still smart. ANd must must must have a joie de vivre that has not diminished because he's 60+.

And who can forget sex? Do I want to swing from a chandelier, probably not because my luck, the chandelier would break and so would I and probably the guy. But, of course we want sex and we want sex that's fun and also, the kind where there's a strong emotional connection not just a physical one. Makes the sex better. Now, am not going to start up with when sex becomes a job because I've already said it. Also, realize that the amour fou at this point is amour fou and self immolation is not that alluring anymore. Fireworks don't have to die, they just change and are better.

Apparently, we are continually attracted to the same "personality type". One of us might  be attracted to the guy whose quiet and sort of keeps you slightly off kilter because you're not getting much info. Or you might like the vivacious, loquacious, extroverted guy who can swing to childlike temper tantrum in a New York minute. 

Is has now  been scientifically proven that we fall for the same guy over and over again even if the former relationships ended because the last S.O. had the same personality type as the one before.  I don't know kids, it can continue to go on ad nauseum.   DING DING DING.

Any bells go off yet?????

Anyway, this pattern can be broken because why would we keep doing this to ourselves over and over again? Because we do but don't have to. 

We need to push back at the urge to go out with the guy who we know is ultimately going to be bad news. Sounds easy, well, it's not and it takes work and a lot of vigilance but it's worth it!!!

While I was reading about all of this it came as no surprise to me that sixty has gone out with the same guy for decades but NO MORE.  I've been working hard on this for awhile and it's working. Why go back to revisit a bad meal? 

TAKEAWAY: Give yourself a kick in the tush, am talking figuratively, of course, and change it up. All of a sudden the passionate, burns the candle at both ends guy who screeches, becomes a lot less enticing. Who has the energy for that sturm und drang??? 

Go forward and break type and don't break a sweat while trying it unless you're breaking a sweat for a good horizonal cha cha with a different personality type than the last 5, 10+ men you have gone out with. WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO



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