Is this really real?? 

Ok, week one into the dating thing and I have to report that some of this stuff that I have heard and seen, I could not make up and sixty has a fertile imagination. 

What would be shocking? It's really not shocking but more what was in the kool aid and hmm, do I really want to drink it?

Yesterday, I posted in my story a message from some oh so charming man who wanted to kiss my feet. Now, I imagine that he thought that he was being clever. When I read the profile, I was like not so much clever and more cup of cuckoo.  So, next and block.

Now we know almost everyone lies about his or her age. Now, stop tutting as this has nothing really to do with age acceptance but more being smart enough to get how the algorithm  works and how one's "stock" falls precipitously as one gets older. I'm sorry reality is REALITY. So calibrating one's expectations and being realistic  is key.

 Many times, there are people who put a disclaimer within the profile saying what his/her true age is. Not, me. And again, no tutting. I wait until the date and then usually spill it. My "lie" is 3 years younger. NO freaking biggie so unroll your eyeballs.

 Why did I choose that  number? My brother is 3 years younger than I am and hence, I know all his benchmarks: college graduation date etc. Nothing worse than asking someone what year he/she graduated college and one gets a deer in the headlights look as the person can't conjure up the benchmark that will coincide with his/her made up age. Sheesh!!!

Why do men think it's ok to have sat next to someone in kindergarten and dated that similarly aged person in college or in his 20's but now, at 65, (probably, real time, 70), his search is 35-55, hence wiping similarly aged women out of the box.  Alrighty, then.  Not much thought goes into this process for many and if the guy is looking for a 35 year old, he is not thinking with the head that rests on his neck/shoulders. Know what I mean???  Ok, I call it like it is. Am I wrong? The answer is most probably DAMN RIGHT!

What does sixty put for age parameters? I put 56-70 as I think that it's realistic considering my made up age and my real age. Are you still following me?

This week, I got the guy who I used to call Mr. 55 and he indeed was 55 and a super good guy. Only one problem, is I was in nyc and he was in nj with kids living at  home. We had a great time with one another for a few months and then he found a local flavor and nicely told me. Was surprised that he messaged me, this go round but gave him credit for doing same. It probably won't go anywhere but yes, I would go out with him again. Why, because, he's smart, kind guy with whom I have a lot in common and hells to the yes, younger has its pluses.

On the flip side of young, I had a date with man who said he was 70. Ok, that's reasonable. I automatically added on a reasonable amount of years and figured why not give him a whirl. After all, is sixty ageist? NOPE. Let' s call this guy Jeff. Jeff met me at a local restaurant and as soon as he walked in I was holy crap, how many decades ago were his profile pics taken.

Told myself to shut up, smiled and sat down. I didn't ask how old he was but he told me that he was 80. That's considerably older than I am and I have to say after 60, every year can often be more equivalent to a dog year. LEGIT. Now, backing up as I am going to get a firestorm of DM's chiding me. TWO EXAMPLES

1-My forever bestie is 83 years old but he has the energy of a 50 year old, has things wrong with him but it's not topic A and is alive and present. Another
2- BFF forever,  at 71, runs daily, thinks nothing of cycling 100 miles and is funny and always up for the next adventure.

This guy wasn't and I was peace out. And did I mention that he asked me if he could lick my fingers. YES, you read that right. NEXT!!!

After leaving finger licking Jeff and NO, he did not lick my fingers, EWWWWWWWWWWW, I found myself chuckling thinking of a conversation my father had with me. Trust me, I was not a willing participant in this convo..

About a decade ago, my father decided that it was in no way inappropriate to tell me to go for an "old" man as a lonely old man would be a catch particularly if he wanted to "take care of me," He was furious that I did not get the logic of his point. OYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

 The quotes are because those are dear old dad's exact words. I tried to flip topics by telling him that no, no, NO 80 year olds and DIDN'T NEED anyone to take care of me ETC ETC ETC.  He wasn't buying it and just kept talking so and I may have told this story, I figured I would shock him into shutting up by bringing up sex.
I said that sleeping with a man decades older than I was didn't work for me. What was dear old dad's retort? "That's why God made vodka". Yup. can you imagine?

Takeway: dear old dad certainly thought he was looking out  for my better interests...I once told him that I had a date to go for breakfast. He didn't talk to me for a week. Brunch, yes, breakfast in his head NO. Maybe, that's where I got no coffee..............

But seriously, or sort of seriously, one has to view dating as a means to an end and that yes, one is going to meet a wide variety of people. Hell, isn't variety the spice of life? Well, yes, but no and yah, It's a process.

BTW, I neglected to mention that date #1 was a nasty, bigoted man who insulted me about 10 minutes into the date. Well, at the 11th minute, I gave him money for my drink and left, leaving him not knowing that he had behaved like a Neanderthal because why bother?

Today, I talked to a lovely man who is separated which i usually avoid but sixty is broadening her horizons plus he sounds great. So check he makes the cut. Talked to another man today who sounded like he had awakened to find himself in 2020 and he was really back in 1985. Thanks but no thanks

And YES, I have a date tonight with a man who gave good phone and sounds interesting and funny. Stay tuned.

Never forget, no one is worth your time unless you think he is. No one can make you feel badly about yourself and if someone tries, it's a definite pasadena. Always remember that you are fabulous you and no one can change that. This can be a humbling experience but it can also, yield someone worthwhile. DON'T LET IT GET TO YOU and never forget to keep DANCING!!!


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